"Zombie Kid Likes Turtles"

I'm sorry. This was too funny.



(As found on Time.com's "YouTube's 50 Best Videos" article, found here.)

(I can't stop laughing.)

Your Mom Goes To College

My mom, too, goes to college.

At least she has been ever since she decided to go back and finish her education.

She's 48 years old.
Bless her heart.

Chemistry

Today I took the hardest test I've ever taken.
I'd rather take the ACT all over again than have to take this test again.
(I'm shooting for med school, so this probably won't mean much for long. Whatever.)

The test was a Chem 105 test, and it took me 3 hours and 40 minutes to take it. But the questions were naaaaaaaaaasty questions--let me tell you.

They were questions like this:

"Calcium carbonate, CaCO3(s), decomposes upon heating to give CaO(s) and CO2(g). A sample of CaCO3 is decomposed, and the carbon dioxide is collected in a 250-mL flask. After the decomposition is complete, the gas has a pressure of 1.3 atm at a temperature of 31 degrees Celsius. How many moles of CO2 gas were generated?"

A beast of a test, I tell you.

I got a 98%.
My life is complete.

Dating Life at BYU

To those of you who have never had the experience of going to college at BYU, and who have never had to subject themselves to the absurdities of the dating life at this college, let me just give you a little glimpse of how things are going for me right now.

I'm sitting on my couch doing just about nothing, when suddenly there's a knock at my door.

(Knock, knock, knock.)

It's this girl. And she slowly looks around the apartment while standing in my doorway, and then she says,
"Hello, um, do you know if...Andrew...is here?"

I point to my face.

"Oh! Andrew! Hi! I'm from the ward. I'm so sorry that I didn't know exactly who you were..."

I invite her in. She's holding a bunch of papers and stuff in her arms, and it looks like it's some sort of "Activities Committee" assignment that she was put in charge of delegating, and she wants me to do something about it. I get this a lot, it seems, and I don't know why. I begin searching for excuses for not being able to volunteer this week.

She sits on my couch.
"So, um, Hello! Um, I was wondering...are you busy this Friday?"

I nod with a completely forced look of regret on my face, and tell her that my dad is coming into town that evening. Which is actually the truth.

"Well, that's a real bummer, um, because, do you know who Rachel Kirkwood is?"

I shake my head and quickly grab the ward directory from the table behind me to find out who this girl is that I'm supposed to know. I know very few people from my ward, and it's always a little awkward not knowing whom people are referring to when they drop somebody's name in the conversation. The girl's picture looks vaguely familiar. Vaguely.

"Well, um, so a bunch of us are going on a date this Friday up the canyon, and we're roasting marshmallows and starbursts and stuff, and it's going to be a lot of fun."

Few things taste better than starbursts roasted over a campfire. She has my full and complete attention.

"Rachel, my roommate, still needs a date. It's too bad you can't come. It will be a lot of fun."

Wait a minute--this is a date??
Remember that only a couple of seconds ago this girl admitted to having never actually seen me in person.

Then she says,
"Oh! But make sure you don't tell Rachel about it--that it's a date, I mean--because she said she didn't want to go if it was going to be a date."

Now I'm totally confused. Some girl knocks on my door, she has no idea who I am or what I look like, she sits on my couch, and she tries to set me up on a blind date with some other girl who also has never spoken a word to me, and who apparently doesn't even want to go on a date with anybody at all.

"So, if we tried to do this another weekend, do you think you might be interested in going on a blind date?"

I laugh, she laughs, we both laugh, and then I show her to the door.

And that pretty much sums up my dating life here at BYU right now. There's a reason why I haven't asked any girls on dates lately. At this point I think celibacy sounds like a better deal.

One Good Man

Someday I want to meet this man, and I want to shake his hand and thank him for what he's doing for the world.

Still Here

Yes, I am alive.
No, I have not posted for a while.
(It's been almost three weeks!)
Yes, I will continue.
Excuse for not blogging?
School.
Forgiveness?
Thank you.

Palindrome

This is a forward that my step-mom e-mailed me, which I will admit I enjoyed.
But please, don't take this as a reason for all of you to send me your favorite forwards.
I hate forwards.
Who doesn't?
Anyway, it's a bit emotion-packed, but that's okay. They usually are.
Reminds me of my mother.

"A plaindrome reads the same backwards as forward. This video reads the exact opposite backwards as forward. Not only does it read the opposite, the meaning is the exact opposite. This is only a 1 minute, 44 second video and it is brilliant. Make sure you read as well as listen forward and backward.

This is a video that was submitted in a contest by a 20-year old. The contest was titled "U@50" by AARP. This video won second place. When they showed it, everyone in the room was awe-struck and broke into spontaneous applause. So simple and yet so brilliant. Take a minute and watch it."

I'm not completely sure of the accuracy of that last anecdote, but it sure does take a slice at your pathos, doesn't it?

Just watch the video: